One of my favorite photographs from the two zillion shots at our son’s recent wedding is our daughter-in-law linking arms with all her bridesmaids, running toward Lake Michigan. What I love about it is how the photographer behind them caught Sara and her sister turning their heads and looking joyously at each other. Everyone else is facing the water straight ahead. When we’re having a moment, we look at our sister, at our brother. There’s something about a sibling.
The times my mother was being the mom in our crazy mother-daughter complexities, I found solace in my brother who understood the players. In her old age, my brother and I talked a lot and often visited her together. We could agonize next to each other or crack jokes that were necessary for mental health purposes. We were and are a team.…
Read moreLet’s count down on the top ways you can sabotage a loved one’s recovery, starting with:
#5 LOOK ON THEM AS DAMAGED GOODS
Sound harsh? I’ve heard all this and worse from well-meaning family members and friends who do not recognize the possibility of long-term recovery, or are just afraid to hope anymore.
#4 MANAGE THEIR LIFE FOR THEM
Because obviously your loved one is not capable. So you pay the bills, pick up the kids and put gas in the car. You put your own life